Health

The Truth about Cigarette Smoking

Written by BuddhaBen on October 18, 2007 1:33 pm EST

So RJ and Phillip have been spending the last decade paying hot college girls to walk through the clubs of every metropolitan city in the country and offer free cigarettes. “All you have to do Kiddo is just swipe that information-rich drivers license right into my here data extraction remarketing cross promotional hand held computer device and just type your email address here, signature saying ˜you allow me to market anything I want to you and sell your info multiple times right here good and here’s your two free pack of cigarettes.” Thank you come again!

And now my friend you are on “The List”…they own you.

Don’t worry. It starts slow. First you get some coupons, maybe a survey. Psst! “Hey kid, what is it that you like, huh, huh. Menthol, reds, lights, recessed filter?” Mmm, says the machinemore infofeed me Seymour!

So larger it gets does project “information extraction”. Years of research, gathering demographic information, and at the same time literally giving away those tasty, stylish, attitude building, candy to a baby, make me cooler cigarettes.

And now.the marketing gets better.

Lighters!! and not the crappy kind with the resin stains on the bottom. Not the kind that is so insignificant that you are unwilling to spend any brainpower on losing it. I’m talking metal, yes metal! And stylish.very stylish. Did I mention windproof flameless ignition?

Next is the ashtray. It too is quite stylish, with some rugged-type, girls-like-me, smoking-is-cool kinda outdated paisley rock star design.on brushed steel nonetheless.

Then you get a portable dominoes set, a grill-out cookbook, more coupons and an offer from a competing brand who bought your information from the first company. (and there’ only 2, not too many industries with just 2 players, seems a little funny,eh?just a thought)

Next comes music oooh. A music industry sees an opening and wants in. So now you’ve got a mix tape of dj-nicotine’ funky groove hip hop meets house vol.1. What th! It’ like Starbucks gone tobacco, has the world gone mad!!

Just so you know I’m not making this up, here’ a recent Pall Mall marketing masterpiece with the aforementioned lighter:

Here’ a quick iq test question: Which one of these words doesnt belong?

Value

Taste

Color

Attitude

Style

Premium tobacco

Are you kidding me!?!?! What is going on here?! They are doing such a wonderful job at creating my whole smoking experience, and all I keep thinking is that my clothes stink, I feel like crap and I dont even like smoking.

But now you’re hooked.

Youre an official smoker. Youve joined the club and received your t-shirt (and hat, belt buckle and bandana). Youve bought the carton (because you think that’ an investment), youve joined the Marlboro frequent smoker club, youve shared it with your frieuh, oh.

And now you become their marketing team.

This is where the cost effective, value added, revenue driving, marketing genius, social networking, viral marketing aspect comes into play. Because you are in the demographic of 18-30 year olds who socialize, you naturally influence your peers. Especially the young ones! I mean the 18-20 year olds that have an influence on the 15-18 year olds. You know, the age at which most people start smoking. This is where the heavy marketing influence of big tobacco just spreadslike a cancer. Except this disease doesnt just spread from cell to cell, it spreads throughout the youth of this country. Move ahead 30 years.

And now to introduce you to. Pharma!

Yes, Im talking about the side-effect inducing, ask- your-doctor-about-erectile dysfunction, make-up diseases on-the-fly nonsense that is ruining the industry which is supposed to be about scientists curing diseases and studying molecules and researching and understanding and debating and formulating and not marketing and promoting and pop culturalizing the cure for bad parenting.

Im sorry I yelled. But seriously!?

Whew. So what is the truth about smoking cigarettes? The truth is that some people smoke, and have for a while. It’ been going on since American Spirit was a bunch of Navaho’s fogging out the teepee. But today, just doesnt seem natural. These things are filled with harmful chemicals and manufactured with the intent of influencing you in the form of addiction. Lets be honesttoday, smoking is a business. It is about money. It is not a national pastime, leisure activity, after dinner treat, stress reducer, bonding experience, ritual of subdual or rite of passage. We know too much. We know it’ bad for us, really bad, and we allow this to go on? It’ blatant. It’ a slap in the face. What are you What am I What are WE going to do about it?

Trackback URL for this post: http://www.gimmiethescoop.com/the-truth-about-cigarette-smoking/trackback

Leave a Reply

Name

Mail (will not be published)

Website