GIMMIE THE SCOOP

Richard Smith

Top 10 Reasons Santa Needs a Payday Loan


November 8, 2007 8:59 am EST

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To all,

This morning, my dear friend and colleague (who will remain nameless) provided me with a Lettermen-esque Top Ten list of reason why Santa needs a Payday Loan. If you find this post either offensive or non-sensical, just chalk it up to…this is what happens when programmers try to be marketers!

Happy Holidays!

Top ten reasons Santa needs a Payday Loan

  1. He’s broke! I mean, the elves only get paid once a year
  2. He rents the factory at the north pole, shouldve bought when North Polean real estate was cheap, might have a chance if the real estate market continues to suck.
  3. His elven accountants suck - They cant depreciate goods longer than a year
  4. He hired an expensive PR firm to spin the scandal of being caught trying to save money by buying cheap Chavez heating oil
  5. Reindeer gas more expensive since the corn prices have gone up due to ethanol demands rising
  6. He really wants to buy the snazzy Apple iSleigh
  7. He has to pay hefty legal fees resulting from fighting the US government that awarded the toy bid to Haliburton
  8. He has a surplus of toys since he has to give fewer to politicians since so many were bad this year.
  9. Higher costs for raw materials to make toys for all the new illegal immigrants
  10. Court fees trying to block latest Tim Allen movie, “The Santa Clause 17 - Vegas Vacation

Surely we can keep adding to this list! Leave a comment with yours and if we like we’ll add yours to the list.



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